When we started in 1997-98, I was the single mom of two little cubs, super-excited about all that scouts offered them. Working on “belt-loops” in different categories (science, baseball, photography, computers, collections, etc.) consumed them as they earned as many shiny metal clips as possible to cover their entire belt. Each month at the pack meeting, they were called up, presented the coup they earned, and congratulated on their effort and determination by the many adult volunteers.
They made pinewood derby cars and regatta boats for racing, baked and decorated cakes for annual auctions, sang silly songs for nursing home residents, created elaborate art projects, had exciting field trips to fire stations and tv stations and museums, went to “day” camps where they fished, hiked, learned to build fires and cook meals and handle responsibly sharp tools and BB guns. They “scouted” for food, coats, and toys for charities. Along the way, they learned good sportsmanship, how to follow directions, how to cheer themselves and others, the joys of volunteering, how to act in public and function considerately in a group, self-reliance, and then, self-confidence. They sold popcorn to pay their own way to camp. They ran and played and got really grubby in the great outdoors, exercising and interacting with other boys and adults. They expressed themselves creatively in a multitude of projects.
Boys do all this with their parents as families, because you are told right up-front, BSA doesn’t stand for Baby Sitters of America. You’re not dropping your kid off for a few hours while you go shopping. You’re taking this journey with your boy. At each rank ceremony, you stand next to him, holding his old scarf as the new one is tied on.
I notice other children in their schools don’t behave the same way. They are more focused on themselves and instant gratification, have no idea how to act respectfully in public or around adults, seem to have less confidence and self-respect, act out for any attention, seem “helpless” when confronted with any small challenge. They’re darker, sadder. I notice other children in the neighborhood, absorbed in video games, who never exercise their bodies or social skills. None of them have a clue what to do with an American flag – a symbol many fellow Americans made the ultimate sacrifice for.
Scouting is year-round, year after year. It consumes your life – everything is a worthy activity, and you see your boys grow and develop skills before your eyes. They go from stars to rocks to insects…you become more involved to make sure the program is as strong as it can be. You understand that YOU are the program, not the few paid staff on-high.
We move up from the Cub Scout Pack to Boy Scout Troop, and my sons are no longer boisterous, happy-go-lucky boys wanting to try and do everything. Puberty is hard, but camping once a month with the troop is a respite from constant pressure to be cool, smart, and perfect. My youngest particularly finds his Zen in nature. They’re doing all the same things, per se, but on a much more sophisticated level.
The troop works differently from the pack. The boys are in charge. The adults are only there in the background to ensure a safe environment. Adults receive a LOT of training to learn how to develop young leaders by not jumping in and leading themselves. The boys learn how to solve their own problems using existing resources. There is a structure of patrols, patrol leaders, a patrol leader council, a senior patrol leader over all patrol leaders – all elected by the boys. They make mistakes, they fix them, they forget things, they find other things to use instead, they argue, they apologize, and they analyze everything with their leaders afterward. All the things they learn can’t even be articulated fully – patience, compassion, preparation, contribution, motivation, communication, teamwork, the power of humor. A patrol leader will discover a patrol member didn’t wash the pans at the end of the previous campout. The “grubmaster” forgot to buy milk at the store to go with the cereal. No one’s going to die over a weekend…but they learn. And get creative. And barter some sausage for some milk from another patrol. Or chop wood for another patrol’s milk.
Saturday nights on campout are “campfires,” where the boys take turns standing up near the campfire with everyone else gathered around sitting while they tell jokes, do skits, lead songs. Some are terrible! No one cares in this special, protected place where one can try his hand at performing in front of others. Sunday mornings are always “chapel” service on a mountaintop or near a waterfall, some amazing natural tribute to our maker. My oldest son was chaplain, and while not particularly religious, he loved putting on a moving service in this spectacular arena and getting to be in charge of this piece of the package, complete with scripture, songs, and sermons designed to embrace all beliefs.
Meanwhile, in the outer world, they are scorned for their patriotism, their attempt to live a life with goals and higher standards set forth in an “oath” and “law” and “motto,” their uniforms that identify them. What a bunch of dorks, the “cool” people exclaim. They just don’t get it. I believe some non-scout kids learn leadership and teamwork through sports and other organizations, but the majority sits on the couch playing video games and eating Ho-Hos. The BSA is the oldest, best, all-around, get-everything-here program for boys there’s ever been. They’ve been helping boys grow to strong, smart, confident, well-adjusted men (physically, mentally, AND spiritually) for a long time. And they’ve got it down.
Few public schools sponsor troops anymore, due to “separation” of church and state. The job has fallen to the community’s churches, and those that have stepped up most often are Mormon and Methodist. But troops are as different as you can imagine all over the country. Did you know there are troops of Muslim boys (BSA doesn’t care what religion you are, by the way, and includes all as equal) and troops of boys of incarcerated moms who meet at the jail so they can include their moms in the activities? BSA does a lot of things in its communities that most people don’t have a clue about. They try to heal families, help immigrants assimilate (many scouts wear certain patches which identify their skill in different languages and ability to translate for others), bring people of different religions together respectfully, and lead a HUGE amount of charity work. They are the Alternative to gangs and drugs and violence. They can definitely BE THE FORCE FOR SOCIAL GOOD in these ways right now.
You begin to study more the boys in the troop who have attained the highest rank of Eagle Scout. They are different than the other boys, the full embodiment, the final product, all the pieces came together. He laughs and jokes with boys and adults in freezing temperatures as he fries up the craziest gourmet-type meal over an open fire and offers some to everyone near. He ties up a tarp when it begins to rain, he breaks out in a funny song just when it becomes the most miserable, he knows he can handle anything life throws his way. And he is constantly teaching younger boys his skills informally by example and formally through presentations.
SIDE NOTE: You’ll never see an Eagle Scout standing in New Orleans as a hurricane sweeps in, wringing his hands, wondering what to do to save himself. It’s inconceivable.
ANOTHER SIDE NOTE: My youngest participated in a trip for older boys called “Kanik” during which he built a quinzee (it’s like an igloo out of snow) to sleep in while learning cold-weather survival skills in the Rocky Mountains of New Mexico one February.
I cried a lot when my youngest son made Eagle. I was so proud, just blown-away by his smarts, patience, and determination as he steadily plowed through his enormous Eagle Project. He designed 19 raccoon-proof trash cans for a city nature park, navigated bureaucratic approval processes for them with the park, city, troop and district, sought funding from businesses to pay for them, selected and purchased materials, and led building and installation teams, overcoming numerous challenges such as no electricity or vehicles inside the park. The installation teams wheel-barrowed the trashcans in for miles and used handsaws and battery-operated tools to install them to existing bases. He communicated by walkie-talkie with his teams who were given his hand-drawn maps to find their sites. He had to make a few adjustments for the park ranger to sign off during final inspection. Did I mention he was 14 years old when he did all this?
Did you know there have been military commanders in the past who requested they be given only men who were Eagle Scouts to accomplish certain missions? (Most astronauts have been Eagles. The guy who pioneered heart surgery – an Eagle.) How can you scorn that? Call them dorky and un-cool while Hollywood makes some lousy movie about the guys on their mission and leaves the Eagle Scout part out.
For those who make snarky comments about the BSA being the mini-military training ground for wanna-be soldiers. Screw you. These ARE the young men who someday fight for your right to be free, lazy, uninformed, and unappreciative. He may even die doing it. Shame on you. When did military aspirations become something to ridicule? Well, aren’t you just the coolest guys ever.
So, now that you know more about the experiences inside the BSA, you wonder why it won’t just succumb to outside pressure to FLAUNT gay leaders. (We all know the likelihood is great that there are already a few gay leaders who don’t advertise it to everybody. There are very different troop personalities all over the world, and I can maybe picture this in San Francisco or something.) Also, we all know that GOOD people are protected by others locally who really know the possibly gay person and the value he/she brings. Think about this: MILLIONS have been involved with scouts.
Can you really expect them to have any other “official” policy than what they have? Leaders are DADs and MOMs with SONs in the units now or in the near past. Leaders are not random-gay-dude with no skin in the game. It’s hard for me to imagine Random Gay Dude just by chance showing up at a troop meeting, announcing he’s gay and therefore has no son to join the troop but wants to be the Scoutmaster. The troop committee made up of active parents is not going to vote this guy as SM. Yeah, really, a committee of the parents chooses the leaders, not some arbitrary government law or agent. And get this, the choice is based on level of training, previous experience, and proven ABILITY. Nobody gets this job just because the government says so. You can’t make parents trust their kids to someone, no matter what YOU legislate. The program fails, and the idea is to get as many kids in a successful, strong program as possible, right? But you’ve forced “tolerance” on BSA policy by being intolerant of their policy…and as a result, BSA fails its mission, most parents keep their kids away, and we have an entire country of stoopid people wringing their hands waiting for someone to come save them when they get wet. No, the world is not a better place without the BSA doing what it can.
Furthermore, troops reflect their sponsor organization. Period. Most are LDS and Methodist churches. One could even surmise that they’re the only organizations who CARE about scouts and make sure this option is available for families in their neighborhoods. I don’t think anyone else has the right to tell them what to do.
BSA does not receive public funding. (I’ve read some pretty amusing essays online stretching waaaaaay out there to try to find some connection to public funds.) An annual fundraising campaign brings donations from former scouts, businessmen, idealists, church people, people who love this program and know what it does for communities. Since there is no public funding, they don’t HAVE to be politically correct. They do want to be successful and serve as many families as possible, and that means being politically incorrect for now.
BSA is one of the greatest programs ever conceived. And they will continue to respond to needs in their society and evolve. (Yeah, they really do that, too. Adding women leaders, improving trainings, updating merit badges, facing unique social challenges, including girls in the Venture crew program…) (Yes, many girls can’t wait until they’re old enough to join Boy Scout Venture Crews and find the “high-adventure” physical challenges they’ve been looking for, e.g. rappelling mountains or white-water rafting.) This is the way it has to be right now. Believe it or not, the BSA still actually deserves your support, no matter what your personal feelings are about the 2-3% of gays in America, for its steadfast commitment to continue to churn out strong young Americans with some idea about values who can lead this country into the future.
