Not Having Fun at the Party

I love gathering with family for the holidays. My sis-in-law asked if I had heard the James Carville quote that ‘if Hillary gave Barack one of her balls, she’d still have more than him.’

Stoopid American Thots:
1. Because Hillary has hers and Bill’s? I dunno. I guess Bill is the only one who would really know, right?...
2. I researched this a little and found that the well-known Democrat strategist said this during a Christian Science Monitor breakfast…I’m kinda admiring his cojones. :^) Hillary + Carville + Obama = how many balls?
3. Wow. Those are some mighty disillusioned Dems.
4. The only way I could put up with James Carville is if I was drunk. And in that case, it would be a HOOT. Actually, Too Much Fun. Which makes me wonder if it is the same for his wife Mary Matalin, the well-known Republican party consultant. We all need to start watching her more closely for signs of intoxication.
5. I’m laughing the hardest about the “apology” given to CNN: “If I offended anybody, I’m not sorry and I don’t apologize," he said. Pure awesomeness.

Corn-fed Babies

Most of what we Americans eat is some arrangement of corn. First, there are the boxes of food that has been “highly processed” in factories using corn as a main ingredient or filler. Then there’s the huge category of “food” to which “high fructose corn syrup” has been added, because it extends the shelf life of food (and has altered our taste buds as a nation to require everything taste sweet). Lastly, meat. Yes, from my understanding, the cows and chickens have been fed corn, because it’s cheaper than grass-grain) until now they’re susceptible to disease. Their digestive systems cannot deal with corn, you see. The Food People are now beginning to feed corn to the fish we eat.

So, we’re sitting around noshing on burgers and Cheetoz and Froot-Loops and fish, but it’s all corn.

That can’t be right, you’re thinking. Let’s check my pantry.

Cap’n Crunch: first ingredient listed is Corn Flour.
Count Chocula (I have a teenage boy…): first ingredient is Whole Grain Corn plus modified corn starch, corn syrup, corn meal – a Monster Cereal, indeed.

Sure, those things are obvious. What about not so obvious?

RICE Krispies: High fructose corn syrup – fifth ingredient
Original Premium Crackers: High fructose corn syrup – fourth ingredient
Bush’s Baked Beans: Modified corn starch
Progresso Plain Bread Crumbs: both high fructose corn syrup and regular old corn syrup

What if we are like the animals and our digestive systems are not suited to corn? And it leads to sickness and disease like…oh, say, cancer and diabetes. So, has anyone ever looked at the big picture and compared cancer numbers to when we increased intake of corn-food? Assuming we can find accurate numbers that haven’t been home-cooked or spun…which I doubt. How long has “cancer” been around? Cancer is just abnormal growth of cells…is there a difference between modern and ancient abnormal cell growth? Actually, I spent an hour of my life trying to do just this thing. Not easy. For some reason, cancer stats are sliced into specific cancers, genders, races…differing survival rates, interpretations of diagnosis, undiagnosed?…and of course, if you have more people, you’re going to have bigger numbers for everything, right.

One very recent (Aug 2010) study at UCLA found that cancer cells grow and multiply faster when fed fructose. The article also stated that between 1970 and 1990, U.S. consumption of high fructose corn syrup increased more than 1000 percent, and HFCS makes up more than 40 percent of sweetener added to food and beverage.

Anyhow, check out this poster from WWI found in Cooter’s history text. Isn’t that cute little boy quite the trooper! Saluting, yes sir, gimme more corn!

Of course, we didn’t intend to poison ourselves or create new diseases. Just another one of those awesome outcomes from the decisions of the Greediest Generation this country has ever seen. The corn is cheap. We can make a lot of money sticking it in everything. We can feed a huge growing population with it – a huge, stoopid population rife with physical and mental impairments. Actually, I can’t lay Widespread Greed just at the feet of the Baby Boomers. The seeds for that were planted before they were ever conceived, when soldiers returned from WWII, but I’ll save that for another article.

So, what does the future hold for us? We may have to look to some place like Israel, for God’s sake, to find something healthy to eat. How ironic, considering many of us Americans have rejected the idea that “God” has rules for what we eat, to maintain optimum health for His children. Meanwhile, Israeli Jews have managed to keep intact Kosher Law and standards.

I’m starting to sound like some sort of Food Nazi. Maybe the answer to this problem is I just need more corn squeezin’s in my whiskey and more whiskey, period.

History

I'm thinking about my grandma today. She and grandpa often disagreed on politics and he would try to get her to change her vote, arguing wifely duty to vote his will :^) and her vote canceled his out, so they might as well stay home. Her vote was very important to her. Wild horses wouldn't stop her from voting for the 1st woman governor of the state of Oklahoma.

Here's a picture of my grandmother holding my mother. Mom had a heart procedure 4 days ago and is not supposed to drive. She drove to the church and voted this morning.

Please go vote.

In My Backyard

Both our D and R gubernatorial candidates here in Oklahoma are women, which is pretty exciting because it means that whoever wins, we will be electing our first female governor. We can all slap ourselves on the back and congratulate ourselves for being so forward-thinking, cutting-edge, new-world-orderish, say just like electing a “black man” as POTUS – we’re so cool and evolved. But unlike the electing of Obama, let’s now take that irrelevant bulls*** off the table and focus on the credentials, character, and intelligence of the candidates.

I really do want to like the Democrat Jari Askins, pictured here to the right of Republican Mary Fallin. My eldest son loves her, says she gives great hugs, she’s kind and concerned, like a grandmother. I’ve noticed some of my stalwart conservative friends supporting her, so I definitely want to give this lady a good looky-loo…

Let’s look at their responses to questions posed by the local newspaper. I chose this on which to focus my “issues” analysis because of the stringent Q&A format the media outlet has followed. (I believe future campaign reform is going to have to push the media into strict Q&A to overcome its current rampant bias. They just can’t seem to stop interjecting themselves into the story whether the question itself is worded in a ridiculous manner or editing candidates’ responses, shifting context, etc.) I was also drawn by the “sexy” headline: “Gubernatorial candidates answer science, technology questions.”

Q: Do you support the state's continued investment in EDGE Fund and if yes, what options would you choose to fund expansion of the trust fund?

Jari Askins:
In 2003, when Governor Henry first announced his comprehensive economic development plan, Economic Development Generating Excellence, I served on one of the committees formed to study and make recommendations for strengthening Oklahoma's economy. One of the results of this effort was the proposal to create a $1 billion research and development endowment as an investment in Oklahoma's science and technology. In 2006, I authored the bill creating the EDGE Fund and also voted to provide the initial funding. It is one of the important components, along with OCAST and i2E, which combine to make a successful technology-based economy.

Mary Fallin:
I do support the continued investment in the EDGE fund. Before we can consider expanding that fund, however, we need to grow our revenue base and get out of this recession we are currently in. I can't promise to spend money the state of Oklahoma does not have, which is why as governor I will immediately work to eliminate government waste and grow our economy. When we do that, we'll have the tax revenue base we need to properly fund EDGE.

Now, let’s analyze. Did Jari answer the question? No. I’m going to assume her answer would be yes to the first part, and IDK to the second part. What she did say was: she was appointed to ONE of many committees formed by our current D guv to STUDY how to improve economy, three years later she wrote a bill to spend $1 billion to form a STATE fund to give money out in the name of “science and technology.” Okay, I support this sort of economic development. But it’s now 2010. Four years later, what has her EDGE fund done? If there were great results, why wouldn’t she have enumerated them? Can I assume there have been none? Actually, I did read in the paper a few days ago that despite our best efforts to get a piece of the bio-tech action, we’re still laughably small potatoes. But she wanted us to know her role in all this, and yet, side-stepped actually answering. Why are we not getting a bigger piece of that pie? Is it “under-funded” actually? Does she have the nerve to suggest it needs MORE money to successfully compete against other states, etc.? Just tell me…

Mary’s response: Answers both parts of the question directly and immediately. Continue, yes; expand, not until other things happen first. She then suggests it’s not properly funded and needs this expansion eventually. What I heard loud and clear: I will not spend money we do not have and perhaps we can identify some wasteful spending and shift it to this.

Move on to Question 2.

Q: The state reaps a greater return in taxes paid by companies in the Presbyterian Health Foundation Research Park than it gives out in tax credits and state sponsored grants to these companies. Under your administration, will tax incentives play a role in encouraging technology-based economic development? What creative ideas do you have for how the state can invest in research and make the state more attractive for investors?

Jari Askins:
Eliminating tax incentives has the potential for creating unintended consequences. However, there is a demand for more transparency and more accountability in order to make them useful for encouraging technology-based economic development. We need to consider ways to help our state's research institutions and our startup technology companies in an effort to strengthen our economy by providing more high quality, high wage jobs. We need to stimulate local investment as well as provide ways to attract federal dollars. I would utilize the collective know-ledge and experience from existing resources to provide impacts, funding recommendations and new creative ideas for how the state can further invest in research to make the state more attractive for investors.

Mary Fallin:
Yes, tax credits will play a role in encouraging the development of technology based companies in my administration. However, each and every tax credit I support must be creating jobs and leading to long-term growth and investment that would not otherwise occur. If a tax credit does not meet those criteria, it is a handout, not an investment.

Jari’s reponse: WOW. Okay, now is when I’m going to have get a little harsh. She starts speaking a foreign language which I don’t speak, politician-buzzword-BS. She has no creative ideas (which is the second part of the question) – she’s going to “utilize collective know-ledge (sp) and experience from existing resources” (in other words, ask everybody else at some point in the future)…as to the first part of the question, she does not answer. Tax incentives – yes or no? Her answer is rambly and weird: A demand for more transparency and accountability will make the incentives more “useful”? Huh? This poor lady has not a clue how economic development works…didn’t she sit on a governor’s committee for ED?

This is the deal: OK and TX go head to head for the locating of a new tech start-up. The company picks whoever comes with the best pitch, the best package in incentives. It’s usually not us. I don’t see where transparency and accountability have diddly-squat to do with it, unless to make the ED person’s job harder, because now they have to explain to the OK public how TX had more and better incentives, better infrastructure, better worker base, less taxes, a more business-friendly environment regarding law suits, etc. One thing did stand out in Jari’s answer: ATTRACT FEDERAL DOLLARS. That’s her answer to economic development? Otay….it’s a typical idiotic answer in the ED world that does not involve a real company with a real market demand and real customers and real value and real revenue and profit… Geez. The sweet lady is over her head and needs a life preserver. I know I’m being harsh, but in Texas, I worked with the technology incubators in Israel to find real markets for real technologies with real value creating real jobs. The endless merry-go-round of government funding should NOT be relied upon and should NOT be sustainable.

Mary’s answer: Simple and to the point. Yes, but it better meet criteria because I’m not in the business of government hand-outs. Awesome. She has got the message loud and clear from the people. I think Mary is smarter than Jari, based on these two questions.

I have watched Mary criss-cross this state relentlessly campaigning for the last year. One Saturday morning, she tried to attend five events in five little towns, renting a plane to make it happen. I just have not seen the same sort of effort from Jari, and even wondered at one point if Jari had health problems preventing this same level of effort.

Okay, I’ve given Jari every opportunity I can to change my mind. Mary is smarter. Mary has campaigned harder, wants it more. What about character? I am disappointed in Mary’s clumsy attempt to say in one of the recent debates something like this: “You should vote for me because I’ve raised a butt-load of kids and Jari has never been married and has no kids.” Very clumsy, earned her a little national notoriety in the media, too. I happen to agree with her, though, privately, because it’s not PC to say it out loud. I don’t think you should hold it against people if they’ve never been out there on the edge of madness as a parent, but really, it’s a special kind of battle stress. When I find out people have never had kids, I’m kind of taken aback…and my head starts spinning, wondering what THAT would be like, to not have huge obstacles to navigate, huge responsibilities to shoulder, huge stress to manage…anyway.

Credentials: They’re both politicians. Jari is a judge-type, focusing in the pardons and parole area, then became a state lej. Mary had a real job at the beginning – hotel management. Then a state lej, then our first female Lt. Guv, then a federal lej. Mary has worked in D.C. – had a front-row seat to the BS. Feels our pain. She gets it.

Mary wins for me, hands-down. Analysis over.

A Call to Arms

I was against Obamacare. No big deal, a lot of people were (some say 70% of the citizenry). But I was OUTRAGED by the manner in which it passed. Our system is supposed to protect us from a king or dictator pushing his will upon us.

I have become more involved in the following months - listening, learning, reading - becoming angrier each day by the astronomical, unprecedented stoopidity and unethical behavior I see everywhere. I have been called names, insulted, ridiculed, verbally attacked, as I aligned with the TEA party (who want the spending under control) and Libertarians (who want the government to butt out).

Please join me tomorrow in beginning the long process of re-claiming our representative form of government.

Our government is like a car-crash/train-wreck/terrorist-bomb/hallucinating-druggie guy stumbling into the ER. First Aid requires we stop the bleeding now (throw out all the Democrat, liberal-elite, tax-and-spend socialists). Brain surgery can come later.

A Different World Today

One of my favorite TV shows years ago was “A Different World,” a spin-off of “The Cosby Show,” which followed the eldest Huxtable daughter to college. The writing was wonderful. The characters were a bit stereotypical the first seasons, but the actors did a good job of fleshing them out eventually. I adored Whitley’s mannerisms and probably still have a crush on geeky Kadeem Hardison.

I remember clearly my favorite episode. It had to do with fireflies captured in a jar. Even after the lid was removed, the fireflies kept banging against the sides of the jar.

This was a show made by African-Americans with an African-American cast for mostly an African-American audience, I presume. The issues addressed were universal.

I can only wonder WHY, 20 years later, we still have this societal race issue. And why is it considered so un-PC, even racist, for a white person to tell those damn fireflies to SHUT UP and FLY.

I think Bill Cosby would have made a better POTUS than Obama.

Furthermore, what do we get for TV shows today? Stoopid crap. “A Different World” dealt with TRUTHS (black Southern Belle Whitley learns her family owned slaves), date rape, domestic violence, AIDS. They did a dance routine one episode that was horrifying and brilliant back then that dealt with the “Mammy” image. Enrollment increases at historically black colleges and universities during the late 80s/ early 90s were credited to this important television program. The show had a message, and it was heard.

What message do people hear today? “You need help. You obviously SUCK and can’t do it on your own. I’m the government – I’m here to help you. Never mind that I have to steal other people’s money to push my will upon you.”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-3cGgr-Rz-w&NR=1

There She Is…

From Cooter’s Psychology text book, a discussion of causes of anorexia nervosa…

“Winners of the Miss America contest have been getting thinner over the years. Since the beginning of the pageant in 1922, the annual winner of the contest has become taller but is 12 pounds lighter in weight. In the late 1920s, her height-to-weight ratio was what the World Health Organization considers to be “normal” today. But in recent years, Miss America has become “undernourished” according to WHO’s standards. As the feminine cultural ideal grows thinner, women with average or heavier-than-average figures feel more and more pressure to slim down.”

Yeah, old news. Still relevant, though. This whole idea of what is beautiful or what is sexy, I don’t know. I don’t like seeing so many fellow American women overweight and ill. But, I don’t like all the stick-models, either. Why such extremes? (Between reality and the cultural ideal…) There is an ad in the latest issue of the Mensa magazine that does make me smile, though. I don’t necessarily want to buy a Mensa t-shirt, but the ad makes me grin. I think she's beautiful.

It’s a Mad, Mad World

Recently I paid $6 for a newsstand copy of Mad magazine, hoping to recapture once again the irreverent glee I experienced as a kid reading this publication. Oh, the giggles as I flipped through Spy vs. Spy, TV parodies, political digs, and cutting social commentary.

I can’t believe they’re still in business, frankly, with the likes of Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert (who looks so much like a young Harold Ramis, the guy who wrote “Animal House” and “Caddyshack,” that it’s spooky!). Well, at $6 a pop, they’re probably on the ropes and soon to be out-of-business if we all don’t hurry to purchase a subscription as Christmas presents for all our friends.

I digress – this full-page “ad” from BP was almost worth the $6. The spoof of Obama as the Wizard of Oz pushed it over the top for me, though. Actually, the piece’s writer tapped into my dreams one night and stole my ideas about witches, scarecrows, lever-cranking, and hot air balloons. Ah, well. Here’s the BP ad.

I'm Not Amused

This is reality, people. Not a TV show or a movie or a video game for entertainment purposes. The political candidates you choose to support in 4 weeks with your vote are either going to continue to steal your money, grow government and spend more tax revenue than they collect OR be fiscally responsible adults.

Please begin evaluating your candidates now, before the Bias Media gets all ramped up full-force, twisting and spinning, making it more difficult to unravel the mess of misinformation.

In These Economic Times…

I had to hurry up and use this phrase as my headline before the Lake Superior State University puts it on their banned words/ phrases list for 2010: http://www.neatorama.com/2010/01/04/banned-words-of-2010/

Actually, I am reading a book about economics that I know will blow my mind. Well, it already has. “Intellectuals and Society” was written by Thomas Sowell, an African-American professor of economics at Stanford. If we had to elect just any anonymous black guy from the academic realm as POTUS (as some people did), why couldn’t it have been this guy?

The tidbit I’m chewing currently asks the question: Why do we assign emotional-drama labels to economic factors such as price? Market determines price, based on the interaction between supply and demand.

Instead, we let our intellectuals (he already covers in Chapter One the difference between intellect and wisdom) attribute human characteristics to a scientific fact like price. How can a price be greedy? Or how can a wage be deemed unfair, when it’s simply the price of labor in a market? If we have a low supply of nurses compared to the demand for them, they can require a pretty nice price for their labor (wage). Likewise, if we have a lot of people (high supply) who choose to pick cotton (probably driven by attained skill set), the wage would be pretty low.

The unfortunate thing is the labels STICK and become part of the public debate with no one questioning the underlying practice.

Chinese Laundry

I had wanted a simple, cheap, comfortable dress to wear around the house while cleaning or cooking or relaxing. Growing up I saw my Southern grandmother wear muumuus for this situation (the 70s version of the 50s “house coat,” "brunch coat," or "duster"). Muumuus were brightly colored, shapeless, frankly obnoxious garments. My generation seems to favor an even more obnoxious sweat pants/ t-shirt combo AND we don’t relegate the look to the privacy of our homes. We sport this anti-fashion everywhere we go, inflicting our sloppy appearance on everyone we encounter!

Well, I was going to up my style game. I could totally see me scrubbing sinks and toilets while rocking this cute sleeveless little denim number from T.J. Maxx, $15. Any bleach spills would only add character to the denim, right? The “Made in China” label did give me pause, but hey, I didn’t want something really nice for this deal. I’m not having tea with the Queen of Washington, D.C.

It literally fell apart in the washing machine after one wearing, one washing. You might point out that it was only $15, that it could even be considered a “disposable” dress at that price. But, take a deeper look, a longer view, at this picture with me.

Is this what we’ve become – a society that wears disposable clothing? How much sub-standard, cheap-ass clothing rots in our landfills? The buttons fell off, and we’re too busy or lazy to sew new ones on. It shrank after a few washings. We can’t even burn a lot of it since manmade fibers are so prevalent; it would be a gooey, melted mass in the garbage heap then.

I laughed at that scene in the “Idiocracy” movie in which the female from our time is presented with clothing of the future – polyester skirts and shirts peeled out of what looked like a Kleenex box, with hundreds more lying just beneath them. Not so far-fetched. Remember the “Units” craze from the late 80s?

(I recently read a hilarious story about Hawaii trying to pay a mainland state to dump its garbage there. Hey, they don’t want the $#*! in their paradise! Actually, their own landfills are near capacity. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/08/24/honolulu-waste-problem-ci_n_692279.html )

What is wrong with us that we keep buying the cheap, made-in-China crap and think happily “that’s exactly what I was looking for.” It’s kind of irresponsible environmentally even. If we paid a little more and demanded higher quality, things would last a little longer or have more re-use potential. How can we completely adjust our thinking process regarding money and buying decisions? It’s tough.

I’m going to try harder, though, to see every transaction as my “vote” to support or not support a policy, philosophy, or technology. I’m going to use my money as my voice to say “no, I don’t want to eat the genetically modified Franken-fish” or “I want the sturdier garden tool that will last 15 years, not two.” Just this week, my 16-year-old son pointed out to me that he drives a PLASTIC car.

I’m just saying, I’m going to try to put a lot more thinking into my thinking.

$#*! My Party Does

One of the slimier things I’ve seen, this is a direct mail piece that mimics the US Census, sent by the Republican National Committee to its party members, approximately January to June 2010. I received at least 4 in my mailbox. (See pics in separate entry below.)

The design is meant to trick recipients into thinking this correspondence is somehow related to the official census we were all required to fill out during that time frame – related, heck, it looked just like the official forms. And used the word “census” many times.

When I actually sat down to read it, I became filled with disgust, for many reasons.

1. I hate anything that masquerades whether as official government correspondence or a scientific survey or a genuine, heartfelt concern about representing me or my views.
2. And of course, it’s a disguised appeal for money!
3. The inflammatory language offends me, pandering to the lowest common denominator – it’s insulting to my intelligence.
4. Party Games: obviously, the GOP was freaked by the TEA party, realized it’s out of touch with its base, figured it would stick its finger up in the wind to gauge direction and yet, never pass up an opportunity to hit up for money. Of course, now they’re really freaked because they’re beginning to realize the jig is up.

We the People are tired of the Washington Games. Is 4 trillion better than 7 trillion? I don’t want compromise. I want stoopid legislation to stop being passed. I want my money to not be wasted on stoopidity. I want the fat government monster to stop growing and butting into my life. I want my elected officials to do their jobs in a humble, ethical, conscientious manner. I want criminal-legislators prosecuted in front of a jury of 12 Regular Joes who pay the bills.

I want all the stoopidity to stop.

$#*! Pics

Did the RNC actually get some serious push-back, enough to make them alter some of the language on the envelope in subsequent mailings (bottom one)?

Inside contents...I should have counted how many times the word "census" was used.

Gotta love inflammatory rhetorical language...

Have you ever seen the money transaction area called the "census certification and reply" area before? I almost admire the grab-em-by-the-throat ballsiness...nah, I take that back. This is MY INTELLIGENCE and ME they're insulting.


The return envelope...

Pigs

My grandfather had a very strong sense of right and wrong, a code of honor, even in the last few years of his life, when dementia/Alzheimer’s was taking its evil grip. He accused a Target store cashier of stealing his lucky silver dollar when he realized it wasn’t in his pocket. Later, when he came to his senses and it was found, he demanded to be taken back to Target so he could apologize in person to the young woman.

He fought his mind disease like the warrior he was. Wrong things BOTHERED him! He couldn’t rest til he’d done the right thing. I remember him crying watching “Mississippi Burning.” And he loved watching Judge Joe Brown and Judge Judy on TV try to straighten folks out!

People like him are gone or dying off, and we’re being overran by selfish, immoral, cut-throat, hateful, ignoble assholes. They’re everywhere.

An amusing quote from Winston Churchill about his pet pig goes something like this: “Dogs look up to you. Cats look down on you. Give me a pig any day. He looks you square in the eye as his equal.” Leaders like Churchill made us laugh as they inspired us to be better than our nature dictated. He still inspires long after his death. What an impact one man made on humanity.

What do we get for leaders today? The Obamas – an all-new precedent for piggish behavior. Bill Clinton? A lying philanderer. Various legislators on both sides of the aisle who’ve lost all sense of morality as care takers of others’ money. Judges who jerk off on the bench.

What do we get for leaders for tomorrow? You tell me.

Uh-Oh, No One's Buying...

...so it must be time for new packaging!

This link will take you to a blog discussing the new Democrat Party logo (pictured above) and motto. I haven't laughed so hard in a long time. I promise you, this is a change that will not matter in six weeks.

http://www.democrats.org/news/blog/575

Fashion of the Future

This is so awesome, there are simply no words for it. This news vignette from the 1930s spotlights American fashion designers' predictions for the year 2000. My favorite: women will need a flashlight attached to their head to help them find an "honest man" in 2000. (I think they hit that one right "on the head" when you look at the state of affairs in today's government, business, church, etc.) Ooh, swish!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U9eAiy0IGBI&feature=player_embedded

Women's Magazines Suck: Part Two

This is a picture of a friend and her 75-year-old mother -- the mom is the one in the cowboy hat :^). Tell me, does this woman look like she needs chic-sexy hair and long-sexy lashes in order to be beautiful? I don't think so!

An American Assault on Women

Well, I’m on a rant today, but it’s not about stoopid politics per se, I guess it’s more like “socio-politics.” I’ve kept one particular issue of a popular women’s magazine for a few years now, meaning to one day hold it up as an example of the Assault on the American Woman’s Psyche. I’m telling you when I see these magazine covers, I want to VISCERATE, really scorch the earth, striking back at whoever and whatever is behind the constant barrage of insinuations that I’m not sexy enough or pretty enough.

So I come across a “special savings offer” from Glamour magazine today, reminding me of this particular axe I wanted to grind.

“10 Extra-Pretty Beauty Tricks Anyone Can Do”

Just Anyone? Really? Even a total schlep like me?

“The New Sex Position That Works Every Time”

New? New to whom? Well, I just can’t imagine what that would be…and to think a woman’s magazine in 2010 discovered this. And is willing to share it with me, for only $1 an issue. Because that’s where I get all my sex advice and expertise… Glamour magazine. ;^)

“Plus 15 More Ways to Heat Things Up”

I guess it’s my job to heat things up. I guess if I’m not happy sexually, the problem MUST be that things aren’t hot enough or more to the point, I’m not hot enough...

“700 Do’s and Don’t’s”

How in the hell have I managed to live this long and not know these SEVEN HUNDRED do’s and don’t’s! “Wow!” is right! I’m a mess – how did I miss SEVEN HUNDRED of these? I must buy this magazine, and in addition I’ll get

· Look-at-me lips
· Long, sexy lashes
· Chic-sexy hair
· High-impact eyes

Yes, I worked in advertising a long time, and this is just advertising copy designed to manufacture a fear in the consumer to elicit an immediate reaction (buying). But, I’m tired of it. After years and years of this message, I’m seeing the big ramifications in our society. Sisters, let’s not fall for it anymore.

SPREAD THE WORD, put everyone on notice that we American women are AMAZING in every way even if we never know those so-called beauty tricks, 700 do’s and don’t’s or that new sex position. Make sure every woman in your life knows this, young and old – especially the young gals who may not have figured out yet what a load of crap the media and “pop culture” are yet.

A Jabberwocky Needs Slayin'

It suddenly occurred to me why I love so much Johnny Depp's Mad Hatter in the recent Tim Burton film "Alice in Wonderland." He is the "id" part in all of us brought to life.

The "id" is the creative genius, staying up all night making crazy beautiful hats, buried amid his bolts of fabric, bric brac, and bobbins.

He is the joy we experience in reuniting with an old friend. He is the happy dance we do when we are victorious. He is the part inside us that gets angry and gets things done, action, not intellect, our range of dazzling emotion. He is our courage, our "muchness."

There is such a thing as too much "muchness"...and such a thing as losing our "muchness."

I wish everyone could embrace our Mad Hatters and reclaim our country. We need him right now.

What pleasure Tim Burton and Johnny Depp, two mad hatters, must experience when working together.

Brilliance, Not Stoopidity

Warning stickers for newspapers. Could make it safe for us to read again...

http://www.tomscott.com/warnings/

More Awesome Stoopidity

That #6 is excellent advice for operating dangerous equipment like a curling iron.

Yet Another Stoopid Product

Brought to our attention by a friend in Dallas, who posted this photo on his Facebook page with just one word:

"Why?"

More Unintended Consequences

My basic position is our federal government should do nothing most of the time because the people in government positions aren’t smart enough to even begin to analyze the many unintended consequences of their “doing something.” And they seem too arrogant to ask experts for advice and too self-serving to care what they say. By “doing something” about a situation they deem as a problem, they can make a case for their re-election, sell themselves as a hero and the public will have long forgotten their involvement when those pesky “unintended consequences” of their actions roll around. (The other funny thing is most of the “heroic” actions the government wants to implement are unfunded – they have no idea how the initiative will be paid for, and really they don’t care, it just sounds good and they look great by voting for it.)

Of course, I have 3 exceptions to my “do nothing” stance: education, defense, and some economic development. Education and defense are obvious needs – although public education is so screwed up, it would take a radical revolution to fix at this point. As for economic development…this is about leveling the playing field in an economy due to other governments’ involvement. I don’t mind giving a little boost to new business ventures to ensure first-mover advantages (one great example being new energy source development).

Recently I came across another example of those “unintended consequences” I wanted to share with you. Texas and California tightened their border security 15 years ago with increased troops, equipment, resources, an organized plan with an Official Name for the Operation. The thinking at that time was “it’s okay to not give Arizona the same level of support.” The harsh terrain of the Sonoran Desert would naturally dissuade illegal immigrants from using that path, so we’ll funnel them all to there…

The result: we created a market for the ruthless coyotes, hired to lead the groups of people through the desert, with a price of $1800 a head. Now look at the mess – the coyotes have become human smugglers, kidnappers, torturers, rapists, murderers…they’re FUNDED, with ability and equipment, like a frickin’ little army operation breaching OUR BORDER!! Are we looking at a counter-military operation to get control of this crazy situation now?

Our border is a defense issue. A security problem. And that’s number one on my “Things to Actually Do” List. Give this action whatever it needs to get done correctly. Please take money from all the other stoopid things we fund.

The American Nightmare

Before anyone discusses immigration policy, they should read this Houston Press article. Every word of it. Nine pages. Look at every bloody photo. Then leave the emotion and personal baggage at the door and come to the table with ideas how to make this stop forever.

http://www.houstonpress.com/2010-08-12/news/seized-inside-the-brutal-world-of-america-s-kidnapping-capital/1/

My ideas: There needs to be a very clear Right Path (Legal Immigration) and Wrong Path (Illegal Immigration) for these people. We need to station troops or WHATEVER it takes to completely shut down the borders, thus eliminating the Wrong Path. Nobody gets through anywhere. I don’t want to hear whining about racism and stopping people with brown skin or white skin. I want every VAN type of vehicle, whether it’s painted white or brown, stopped and searched, if it will save lives! And I believe it will. I don’t care who is driving the van. (Actually, the article mentions the use of white drivers to deter suspicion.)

Then we focus on improving efficiency of the Right Path. People waiting 20 years for approved status is obviously not acceptable.

I have ideas how to improve this efficiency. Obviously, government can’t be trusted to do it correctly. It creates systems that take 20 years to deal with an application. We need to take whatever money is spent on this process now and give it to private American companies who will be paid to perform the following services:

1. Process applications. Crank levers, assign ID numbers. Issue papers.
2. Maintain a national database of all immigrants in order to track and monitor their successful acclimation, including photos and fingerprints. This sounds as if I want to “criminalize” them when in reality, these people are at great risk for “victimization.” And if they did come here to engage in criminal activity, we’ve at least got an eye on them.
3. Provide employment and entrepreneurial support services. The goal is to help find them all jobs or start new businesses, paying taxes. The company would act as a national employment agency and marketing firm, identifying markets for the new immigrants that are more likely to have demand for a new Mexican restaurant, building or construction company, artisan skills, etc.
4. Provide language instruction and culture assimilation classes. The goal is to ease their transition into our American society (and to lessen opportunity for conflict to occur). This will also hopefully take some burden off the education system, which has been forced to deal with these problems alone in the past. I would also include business classes. There is so much these people should be taught and right now, they’re left on their own to figure things out.

By providing this improved Right Path, the legal immigrants will have a better understanding of how things work in our society (through formal instruction received) and a better relationship with “government” and therefore trust in law enforcement. The crimes committed and suffered by those engaged in both sides of the illegal immigration are simply unacceptable in a civilized society.

When two distinct groups of people come together, a transfer occurs…a transfer of knowledge, customs, behaviors, etc. A meshing, I guess is how one would describe it. I’m fine with eating Mexican food (it happens to be my favorite food). I’m fine with learning a little Spanish for fun, actually it’s interesting. I am also fascinated in many of the games, religious activities, family traditions that have been described to me by friends. I AM NOT FINE with an attitude that condones corruption, violence, drugs, rape, torture, and slavery as an accepted part of life. I don’t want it brought here and becoming part of the fabric of our society, as is happening right now.

To restate: 1. Eliminate the uncontrolled, coyote-driven, wide-open, free-for-all ILLEGAL AND INCORRECT PATH. 2. Fix the CORRECT PATH improving the processing speed, chances for success, and safety for an at-risk people. A successful transition means more people paying taxes, not receiving social services yet helping to pay for other public services they use such as education. The current situation amplifies the natural conflict, undermining positive experiences for all.

Congress has ignored this problem for 20 years at least – until the current point in time…when the crisis is marked by the emotion of an angry citizenry on one side who are overtaxed to provide free services to those here by illegal means and the desperation of a downtrodden people on the other side who will make deals with the devil and pray they live through it. I’m afraid the situation has become so full of rhetoric and dug-in stances that the subject cannot even be discussed reasonably.

But we must discuss it. I haven’t even mentioned the obvious national security issue inherent. Any Tom, Dick, or Harry terrorist can simply walk across our borders and wreak havoc. Meanwhile, we’ve focused on increased procedures at airports. Does that really make sense, to be so vigilant in one area while leaving another avenue wide-open? No, plugging up those porous borders is Job One, for so many reasons. All coyotes shot on sight. That’s a career choice that needs to become synonymous with sure death in my book.

Some want to drag possible “civil rights” violations into the discussion. This seems odd to me when our entire legal policy of search and seizure is already a careful balance between maintaining a civil society and respecting individuals’ rights. I have no problem placing my trust in trained law enforcement personnel to make the right call whether probable cause exists to further inquire for papers. I already trust them right now, every day. Driving a white van is probable cause in my book. Seriously, these people work this area and this situation daily – they know what to look for. I would like to emphasize that when I commit a violation in my car and am stopped, I am asked to produce my papers. I keep them on me every time I leave the house. I am happy to produce them because I am NOT a drug mule or human trafficker. I am happy to produce them because I want the real drug mules and human traffickers caught. I want order in my society, not rampant crime.

Also, we obviously cannot allow EVERY person who wants to immigrate to our country, do so. We cannot absorb the numbers, economically…but we can make a system that works much better. And maybe, in the meantime, Mexico can work on improving itself. I mean, what is that country’s dang problem anyway.

I have the strength to say NO to continued illegal immigration, I have the strength to ignore name-calling by others who think I am hatin’ on the Mexicans or bartering our civil rights away, and I definitely have the strength to protect the illegal immigrant from himself. Staying in Mexico until the Correct Path can serve him is preferable to death, whether he thinks so or not.

Common Ground

I really do not understand any religion that does not ENCOURAGE its followers to take optimal care of their bodies (and brains) with nourishment and water.

BTW, I have a friend serving overseas right now who let us know breakfast was being served from 0200 to 0400, in order to accommodate Muslims (who during Ramadan cannot eat from sunup to sundown). Soooooo, the overwhelming majority of non-Muslim troops are expected to eat at 2 am or go without. Whatever happened to common sense?

And this Ramadan "fasting" goes on for an entire month...

How's that for shoving your religion upon someone else. And not just for a little while, like an easily forgiveable inconvenience or inconsideration. And are we really so stoopid we can't arrange a happy compromise that accommodates everyone?

DIVISIVE POLICIES are the order of the day. :^)

Duty

The real Commander in Chief, doing his J-O-B, not on endless vacay. This is a pic taken this morning at DFW of the Bushes surprising the troops arriving home, with their presence and their gratitude.

By God, he was a great war president. I don't give a damn who you are or what you think.

I am so loving these pics of surprised soldiers...

No, Nyet, No Mas, Non, Nein…All You Need to “Know”

There IS no taxpayers’ money left, people. Now we’re borrowing money from China to pay for our stoopid bulls***. Many people still don't understand that.

This is the picture: You walk by a bunch of panhandlers on the street corner, oh, let’s call them Starving African Nations. You think there is no way you as a fellow human being can abide this suffering. So, you turn to your friend walking next to you, named China, and say hey, loan me a few billion, I’m good for it. He does, and you turn and give it to the bums. They laugh and walk away to go buy themselves a gold-plated bed. You realize you just got screwed. The people are still starving, Zimbabwe dictator has a flashy new crib, and you owe your cranky friend a Whole Bunch of Money that will take about a thousand years to pay back.

The next day, Starving African Nations shows up again, because standing on street corners pays very well. You say, “I’m sorry, I don’t have the money to help you.” They gang up and beat the crap out of you, angry, because they have begun to feel very much entitled to whatever is in your pocket, meant to feed your own children.

The new litmus test for every single thing is: Is this worth borrowing from China to pay for? Do we have the intestinal fortitude to say out loud, loud enough for the world to hear, “I’m sorry. I don’t have the money to help you.” Do we have the intestinal fortitude to realize that our money and involvement only make things worse?

LMBO! Oh, wait a minute…it’s my money.

Tell me the story again how the stimulus package is going to save the ‘conomy and create jobs (unemployment now at: 9.6%). I’m feeling sleeeepy, Uncle O.

http://coburn.senate.gov/public//index.cfm?a=Files.Serve&File_id=a7e82141-1a9e-4eec-b160-6a8e62427efb

“Shut up, you peasants! Eat your cake, and get back to work!”

“But, I can’t take any more cake…”

I’m Gagging on the Cake

I believe Michelle Obama is the most worthless first lady we have had in recent history. Remember the hullabaloo when Nancy Reagan ordered new china for state dinners so all the pieces would actually match? Boy, did they rake her over the coals. How dare she desire all the plates to match. (If I remember right, they were originally all donated pieces.) Well, that ain’t nothin’ compared to our newest FLOTUS in all her self-proclaimed “fabulosity.”

(There was another china scandal, I believe – Mary Lincoln bought new china during the Civil War, and don’t you think the s*** didn’t hit the fan on that deal. Not during a wahhhhhhr-uhhhh! People are suffering, in case you hadn’t heard.)

Before we leave the very important topic of White House china, a foundation was formed under Nancy, after the brouhaha, to receive private monetary donations and handle these sorts of prickly matters. Hillary Clinton designed a new set ($250K) before she left, but we didn’t hear a word about it because it was then a private foundation matter.

Michelle caught my eye recently when pictures appeared in the media of her vacation in Spain…and I thought: How many damn vacations can one family take in one summer? The summer of the Oil Spill, the summer of the worst economy I’ve experienced since I graduated college 25 years ago, the first summer after the huge government bailouts for every industry you can think and the huge health care takeover, all to be funded by the American people. We’re talking pain and suffering here, people. And how many wars have we got going?

And yet, there’s photos of the Obamas in North Carolina (end of April), photos of the Obamas in Maine (mid-July), photos of the Obamas in Chicago (instead of wreath ceremony on Memorial Day), Barry golfing (by my count, 8 times since the oil gush began), Michelle shopping in Spain, the command performances for our royal first family by Paul McCartney, Stevie Wonder…all in a 3-month span? WTF? And when she gets back, I believe they have another one planned for Martha’s Vineyard in two weeks.

I know this is an old gripe – whoever is in power is attacked as “elite-rich lollygagging on our dime” by the other party not in power at the time. Old as the hills, folks. But, have you ever seen it soooooo in-your-face?

We’ve had Glamour Queen First Ladies in the past that we’ve actually idolized – I give you the iconic Jackie O. But, see, she wasn’t Jackie O when she was Jackie Kennedy. She became Jackie O when she married Ari Onassis, one of the richest men in the world (and one of the few she probably felt had the means to truly be able to protect her). Yeah, she became famous for her spending sprees and living on a yacht. But, don’t you think she didn’t earn every penny, girlfren – have you seen pictures of Ari? Besides, she probably NEEDED lots of therapy, retail and otherwise, after seeing her first husband’s head explode next to her (and dreaming of doing it herself due to all his womanizing).

So, this week we see Michelle O on a special vacation to Spain with her 9-year-old daughter…and 40 of her closest friends at a 5-star hotel, $2500 room/night rate. The media is having a heyday with the Marie “Let Them Eat Cake” Antoinette comparisons. (Let’s not even follow that further down the historical path to the French Revolution…)

Both BO and MO are a PR nightmare. You would think that one of the 22 personal staffers assisting Michelle O would know something about managing a public image. They’re probably as worthless as her and hired based on affirmative action policy. Just like her husband was.

And here’s the punch line, folks. Wait…wait…here goes:

“I’m not going to rest or be satisfied until the leak is stopped at the source, the oil in the Gulf is contained and cleaned up, and the people in the Gulf are able to go back to their lives and their livelihoods.”
Barack Obama
May 14, 2010
Speaking On the Gulf Oil Spill Disaster

Priorities - Take 2

I was extremely disappointed when BO didn’t attend last week’s BSA Jamboree. After much consideration, I have decided to share my Facebook Ranting with you on my blog. NOTE: The White House said he attended fundraisers instead that were on his schedule “months” in advance. However, he was also taping his appearance on the daytime talk show “The View” during that time.

“OF COURSE Obama is not attending the Boy Scouts of America Jamboree, marking the organization's 100th Anniversary. Because he's a punk-ass piece of crap. He has fundraisers he's doing instead that are waaaay more important to him. Awesome link chronicling former presidents' scouts involvement.”

http://www.scouting.org/About/FactSheets/presidents.aspx

“Obama's ‘involvement’? He accepted the group's routine annual report to Congress and stood for 15 seconds for a photo op. Oh, yeah, and accepted a basketball as a gift from the kids. Dubya, in his Jamboree speech, thanked the group for its 1.4 MILLION HOURS of community service for that year. In 1934, hundreds of thousands of Scouts assembled to hear FDR's broadcast appealing for help for the needy. They responded by collecting nearly two million articles of clothing, household furnishings, and other items for disadvantaged families. Fun Fact Time for my Scouting Friends: Jimmie Carter was a troop committee chair!”

“Just another FYI for Obama: The BSA Jamboree is an every-4-years event. This one marking the 100th anniversary of scouting will never happen again. You missed an awesome PR op because you're an idiot. You won't get another chance for this.”



My time as a BSA volunteer leader was some of the happiest years of my life, doing way more important stuff than Obama.

My starship must have crash-landed and erased my memory…

Saw Toy Story 3 last night. Was anybody else as annoyed as me about the Spanish-speaking Buzz?

I can’t even put my finger on it exactly. I guess it makes me uncomfortable to be preached at by Hollywood, because they are such a moral yardstick for the rest us. Not! But Disney has been preaching for many years now…and we do want our children to be exposed to a diversity message. However, they push their agenda in such a boneheaded way! If you’re going to switch Buzz to a Spanish-speaking mode, running English subtitles along the bottom (and trust me, the whole joke goes on WAAAAAY too long), does he have to be turned into such a stereotypical “cartoon” (pun intended). Well, I guess so.

And Mr. Potato Head becomes Mr. Tortilla Head during the big escape from the day care center…could they be more subtle about romancing their future market?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iG9VLxlccx4&feature=related

"I was born a poor black child…"

What if I start checking all the boxes on government forms asking about my race? I can't prove or disprove any of them anyway. And I would be amused to see a government official attempt to prove or disprove without obvious visual profiling. I think EVERYONE should start checking all the boxes.

I Got Burned by Obama

Family and friends have asked me to comment on the new tax placed on the services offered by tanning salons, which went into effect July 1 under the Obamacare New Deal. Feelings are that this is discriminatory and racist, pretty much a special tax on white people. I would be glad to weigh in, and meant to do so long before now.

This definitely looks like a targeted tax on me. And it is. First, let me provide some information from someone who actually uses these services.

I have used tanning salon services off and on for the last 25 years. I am a fair-skinned person who goes to the salon for one month out of the year in the late spring, to establish a light base tan to avoid a horrible shock-scorch during outdoor summer activities. I begin with 6-8 minutes of exposure, working slowly up to 15 minutes by the end of the month, always using protective eye gear and appropriate lotions before and after each exposure. And I do not go every day, usually every 3 days.

The special lotions designed for pre- and post-care (sold at the salon) are far superior to anything one can buy anywhere else. They soften and re-moisturize skin, and they do not mess around. These lotions accelerate the process, lessening overall actual exposure time.

I recently visited a dermatologist to make sure I have no melanoma, which I do not. I personally believe a bad diet can place one more at risk for cancer than careful, occasional tanning.

Another consideration: I personally know people whose dermatologists have PRESCRIBED careful, controlled exposure as a way to decrease and control severe, life-altering, scarring acne…so we have Obamacare placing additional taxation upon some people’s cure for certain medical problems. Oops. I’m sure lawmakers meant to put a “sin tax” on a behavior they’ve been told is cancer-causing.

An interesting Wikipedia article on Light Therapy discusses UVA and UVB (the types of ultraviolet light used in bulbs in different tanning beds) for psoriasis and eczema and acne…there’s even been some positive results for those suffering from different types of depression.

I’m sure dermatologists are loving this…Obamacare runs the tanning salons out of business, and the patients have to come to their offices where they have set up tanning beds and can charge insurance companies outrageous prices for “treatments.” Because that is the unintended effect of taxation that idiotic lawmakers NEVER SEEM TO GET!! Have these assholes never taken an economics class?

It’s called the “Substitution Theory of Economics.” People will simply use substitutes for the goods for which the cost has increased due to taxation. This new tax will not result in increased tax revenue for the government. People will now resort to the much more harmful behavior of “laying out” in their backyards for hours, with no careful timing or careful application of healing re-hydration lotions. Salons go out of business. Jobs are lost. Economy is hurt. Incidence of melanoma rises. Health care costs increase. LOSE-LOSE-LOSE. Dermatologists get RICH-RICH-RICH.

Or more people will just buy their own tanning bed to set up in their house and use indiscriminately. No supervision. No professional input.

Another pesky detail: Salons offer non-UVA/B-exposure choices. You know, sunless tanning, all-over body spraying, etc. Are these taxed as well? There’s no “sin” attached here. No bad cancer-causing behavior to be discouraged by Uncle O.

But, we haven’t really addressed the race issue yet. Do darker-skinned people use tanning salon services as often as light-skinned people do? No. A few do, but by and large, no. Hey, what about gender? Do men use tanning services as often as women do? No. A few do, but by and large, no.

All of these puzzle pieces viewed together suggest to me one thing: Targeted RACISM AND SEXISM. Which really pisses me off because I distinctly remember Obama saying on my television screen there would be NO increased taxes for people with incomes below x-y-z. I’m well below x-y-z, however I am w-h-i-t-e (or let me clarify, mostly Caucasian with fair skin tone) and a g-i-r-l. The bastard lied. Plain and simple.

This is the part that makes me the angriest. After all the little pissant tanning salons have been sacrificed (and frankly, we all know that the tanning salons are tiny businesses with no power or clout owned by women serving women, barely making enough to cover their rent), Obamacare’s so-called funding and consumer protection objectives will still not be achieved. Stoopid.

Hold the Phone – That Can’t Be Right!

Listening to the local news a few nights ago, I hear the following: “If you receive welfare benefits, you may be eligible for a free cell phone and calling plan from the government, set up through major phone companies like Sprint…”

Yep, I went to the news channel’s website, and there the link was. We are borrowing billions from China to pay for ridiculous s*** like this because having a cell phone is now considered a LIFE OR DEATH matter.

http://www.okcfox.com/newsroom/links/ (Under Saturday, July 31 links)

The details:
“If you are on any form of government assistance (Food Stamps, Social Security Income (SSI), Medicaid, Section 8 public housing, TANF, School Lunch Program), you may qualify for a government discounted cell phone with monthly minutes. You get a FREE cell phone with FREE monthly minutes and no contracts ever. You may also sign up for our $15 weekly unlimited plan including talk, text and data.”

Is that the plan that enables them to photograph their hoo-haw and send it to their baby-daddies? This is important, you know! They need to stay in touch.

The anchors go on to mention another deal for those living in certain areas. Free BlackBerry SmartPhone for people trying to quit smoking. A CNN link with more info:
http://m.crackberry.com/node/123232

Make sure to scan the post-comments for all the readers who plan to start smoking so they can get a free BlackBerry as they then “attempt” to quit. As one reader points out, “the government didn’t sit on their a**es, they spent our money, and it didn’t work.” This is an excellent point worth emphasizing. THE GOVERNMENT CAN’T GET ANYTHING RIGHT. THE SOLUTION IS TO SAY NO TO EVERY BILL INTRODUCED! Do not look to them for answers.

And one more goodie: An article on American Thinker citing Coburn and McCain’s stimulus report for additional info on the damn cell phones (the stop-smoking-BlackBerries will be funded by stimulus money and will create exactly two jobs).

http://www.americanthinker.com/blog/2010/08/your_stim_dollars_at_work_ipho.html

Kinda leaves you speechless, huh.

(Photos that go with the Hot Story)

Has hot pink ever looked so hot?

Maybe we can make it work?

Can you see the attraction?

One Love Affair I hope never ends...

It Sure Is Hot Here in Oklahoma

I have a Weather Man Boyfriend (Rick Mitchell, chief meteorologist of KOCO in OKC), a Football Boyfriend (Brett Favre – he makes my heart palpitate every time he throws a pass), and a Gay Boyfriend (Tim Gunn of “Project Runway,” with his vast and unimpugnable vocabulary).

Occasionally, I have to break it off, like, when my favorite show is interrupted by anything less than an F-4 on my street, or when Brett throws an interception. Which is okay, because there’s always OU Sooners head football coach Bob Stoops standing on the sidelines, ready to gamble all on a fake punt. The heart is a fickle thing. Sigh. Men who know how to excite.

One man who really knows how to stimulate, however, is my Politician Boyfriend – Sen. Tom Coburn, an MD from OK. Go ahead, Google him – I’ll wait. See all the breathtaking headlines – “The Most Hated Man in Washington,” “Battling Dr. No,” and “Hi, I’m Senator Coburn, and I Don’t Want Your Vote.” The man just knows how to rile up LEGIONS with one hold or filibuster or parliamentary procedure. The good doctor sports a pair even Sarah Palin could admire.

Some of the juiciest paragraphs written about my Secret Crush:

“No other senator has paved a more solitary path, butting heads with nearly every member of his own party and most of the opposition. In fact, as the Republican majority has run aground on fiscal issues over the past few years—racking up unprecedented deficits and a soaring national debt while the Democrats mostly kept out of the way—Coburn has often seemed like an opposition party unto himself. In April, for example, he tackled nineteen highly questionable expenses that his colleagues had slipped into the budget at the last minute—money that no branch of government had requested, which would directly benefit Senate campaign supporters. In September, he teamed up with Barack Obama to expose federal waste by putting the national budget on a public Web site—a prospect so alarming to some senators that two of them tried to kill it anonymously. And in December, as his Republican colleagues began cleaning out their offices to make room for the new Democratic leadership, Coburn fired a parting shot: Using legislative procedures, he blocked the GOP from finishing its annual business and pushed many of the most important budgetary decisions for incoming Democrats to make in the New Year.” – 2007 article in GQ

“The debate over the ‘bridge to nowhere’ in Alaska was Coburn’s doing. Coburn told Reason magazine’s David Weigel that when Alaska Sen. Ted Stevens pitched a massive fit and repeatedly threatened to resign, Coburn wasn’t so much worried about the political fallout as about Stevens’ ‘blood pressure, and whether I would have to resuscitate him on the floor of the Senate.’ Fortunately, Stevens survived to pork barrel another day.” – 2008 article on Politico

“That's what Tom Coburn wants you to know. Not about the bridge; about the bigger thing. He wants you to know how it works in Washington, how the machine keeps itself running, and the favors get traded, and the deals get struck, and the bridges to nowhere are going up every day. He wants you to know that the United States Congress simply cannot stop itself—that both parties are in on the fix, backing each other and looking the other way, and that in the spirit of bipartisan waste, they manage to blow $500 billion more than they collect in taxes every single year. He wants you to see where that money is going: the 10,000 personal projects and earmarks that senators and congressmen are sneaking into the federal budget every year—like the Waterfree Urinal Conservation Initiative in Michigan. And the Sparta Teapot Museum in North Carolina. And the Appalachian Fruit Laboratory in West Virginia. All paid for with your tax dollars.

That's what Tom Coburn wants you to know. That the members of the United States Congress will spend your money just because they can. That they'll do it even when they can't. That every year, they borrow the extra $500 billion from China, raising their own credit limit each time they reach it and then raising it again the next year, for a total of $9 trillion in debt so far. That's right, nine trillion dollars, a figure so enormous that even if the fifty richest people on earth—including Bill Gates and Warren Buffett and Michael Dell, along with the richest men in Saudi Arabia and Russia and Hong Kong—got together and sold everything they owned, right down to the last buttons on their last embroidered shirts, and then they donated all their money to the U.S. national debt, they still couldn't afford to pay a single year of interest at 10 percent. That's how much $9 trillion is, and that's what Tom Coburn wants you to know: that in Washington, there isn't really a party in charge, or a principle, or a leader. What's in charge is the money. Because at the end of the day, when it comes down to a choice between borrowing $200 million from China to build a bridge to nowhere and taking a stand against government waste, four out of five politicians will blow it on the bridge.” – back to the 2007 GQ article

Oh, my.

So, what exactly is my man up to these days. Well, there’s the Waco thing. Apparently, 24 mammoths were buried in Waco 68,000 years ago and the fine people of that area want to make it a National Monument. Hey, I love history, especially the ancient kind, just ask anybody. So, what’s the problem.

The cost to designate a National Monument is 1 MILLION DOLLARS. The cost to maintain it is $400,000 each year after that. Is it worth borrowing from China to make happen? Nope. Thus a legislative hold in a Senate subcommittee two years ago, by my hero employing the “anonymous hold” tactic. (To hell with anonymity. Coburn was glad to take public credit. Cojones the size of Texas, my friends.)

Well, the time limit is almost up for the bill, and the people of Waco are afraid that their buffalo are going to get buried again, this time under legislative bulls***. Waaaaaaah, Waco. SMU poli-sci prof Cal Jillson said “Coburn has little positive agenda, in terms of bills he’s trying to get passed, and you don’t want that kind of guy as your enemy.” Yes, he’s got nothing to lose and no personal agenda. Isn’t he awesome? It’s sooooo...stately.

He’s also released a policy paper analyzing how illegal immigrants will fare under Obamacare, promo and link on the website for the National Center for Policy Analysis. The tidbit:

“Senator Tom Coburn's (R-Okla.) office recently issued a policy paper titled, "Bad Medicine," on the new federal health care law that's worth reading. Among the gems is a finding that immigrants in some ways get a better deal than U.S. citizens and legal residents under the new health reform law, says health economist Devon Herrick.
For example:
• If you are a legal resident alien you will be required to obtain the same government mandated health coverage that U.S. citizens must obtain.
• However, if you have been here for less than five years, and if your income falls below 133 percent of the federal poverty level, you will not be allowed to enroll in Medicaid -- as U.S. citizens will be required to do.
• Instead, you will be able to obtain highly subsidized insurance (paying a premium, say, of 10 cents on the dollar) in a health insurance exchange.
• If Medicaid insurance is lower-quality insurance, you will have access to better insurance than a U.S. citizen with the same income!
If you are an undocumented immigrant you will not be subject to the individual insurance mandate and you will not be fined if you fail to purchase health insurance, nor will you be allowed to enroll in Medicaid or buy insurance in the health insurance exchange, says Herrick.
However, hospital emergency rooms will not be able to deny you health care if you are in need. What makes this surprising is that the most common argument for an individual mandate is that the uninsured should have to contribute to their own health care instead of getting it for free in the emergency room. This is why U.S. citizens will be required to pay hefty fines if they do not obtain insurance. If you are here illegally, however, you get to escape that penalty, says Herrick."

Nothing like a crappy health care bill favoring illegals to get the racists going. Nice move, Barry. There’s just not enough hate in the world. And it was definitely worth borrowing from China to finance. Not.

And don’t think Dr. Coburn won’t put his own state under the microscope, as well. Coburn and McCain released a list Tuesday of the Top 100 Most Wasteful Stimulus Projects in the Country, and here’s a link to one in OK.

http://www.news9.com/global/story.asp?s=12917360

Sidewalks to nowhere. Love that reader asking if they begin in front of the school because that’s where the kids are going with their public education. Population of the town is 274. I ask again, was it worth borrowing from China to pay for?

You’ve got to read the senators’ full report…did you know BP received over $300 MILLION in stimulus funds?

I know the rest of you are probably sooooo jealous because your man/ woman is just not as good as mine. And I do feel sorry for you. Actually…for all of us.

Casino Night

Okay, this is the latest Weird Deal. I catch C-SPAN the other night, watching the investigative subcommittee report its findings to the larger Congressional committee regarding NY Rep. Charlie Rangel’s ethics violations. It took them two years to get all the crap from the guy in obvious delay tactics (yawn) and committee personnel changes (two yawns).

Just read that the committee is now beginning its work on the Next One…Rep. Maxine Waters from CA, a lady whose husband sat on the board of a bank for which she arranged government assistance…

Stoopid American Thots: That is ONE VERY BUSY subcommittee. And no one volunteers for those committees. :^) But this is the part that made me sit straight up and wonder WTF does THAT mean? “Waters, like Rangel, could settle her case by arranging a plea bargain with the ethics committee.”

What are they “bargaining” with? On both sides? Geez. Apparently ETHICS VIOLATIONS punishments are bargaining chips. Double down and split the pair. Any side bets that the American people get cheated?

Yes, Let's Talk About Slavery

Sitting in an American public school classroom, I learned all about the evil whitey slave-owners and the noble, African people brought to the US in chains on slave ships. If only life was so black-and-white, and good and bad so simple to discern.

But, it’s not.

There were good white people fighting to end slavery (Civil War), Quakers aiding the slaves in their struggles (Underground Railroad), white men who fell in love with black slave women (Thomas Jefferson). (Actually, Sally was paid a wage for her seamstress skills, making her an employee not a slave in today’s terms, and their children were all legally “freed” and lived as “whites.”)

Was Thomas Jefferson an evil whitey slave-holder? I see a man forced to live in a time under societal circumstances that would not allow him to marry his life partner and true love. Think of all the arranged marriages in societies all over the world. There have always been societal laws over there (wives), and over here, Real Life (mistresses). Thank God he had Sally for comfort and support as he did his life’s work of helping to create the greatest nation this planet has ever seen. I digress. The point is was he an evil man ruthlessly raping one of his black female sex slaves or a man in love? How could any of us claim to know for sure? They had six children.

I have never felt like an evil whitey, although I was born with blonde hair and blue-green eyes. I was also born with the intelligence to look another person in the eyes and see their heart and true measure. This is not found in skin color.

When I imagine my family history, I see a lot of poor farmers, Cherokee Indians, and fighters (soldiers, warriors). My grandmother always laughed and winked when she called us “Black Dutch” – a term used for many generations to hide mixed-race blood between whites and Indians and whites and blacks. My half-blood Cherokee ancestors claimed this to avoid removal. (I have as much Native blood as many on the public dole, but my people chose a different path, to live in the future, not the past.) Why am I discriminated against for certain opportunities for NOT looking like I have mixed blood?

My Cherokee ancestors could have been slave owners, too. I recently read a fascinating side-by-side comparison of how African slaves and their NATIVE AMERICAN owners lived (found in an OK history text book). They struggled together as practically equal partners to live in a harsh, pioneer environ. They did the same work, ate the same food, slept in similar beds, children reared and educated equally. I see this as people working together to survive. Imagine you are a settler who needs more hands, help – one option is purchasing a slave family to live and work with you.

Did you know African tribes captured other African tribes and sold them into slavery? Our moral outrage demands we find a villain to blame, someone to PAY for the sin of slavery. The conquering tribe? Those who purchased (US plantation owners)? Those who bought and used the cotton (British textile mills)?

Let’s look at the world economic picture the latter part of the 1700s. Cotton plantations in the US deep South were pitted against those in India for the business of the British textile mills, victor determined by cheapest prices, of course. Both were snatching up the world’s supply of slave workers to drive down labor costs. Not quite the situation of “the master” just not feeling like shining his own shoes.

Actually, our time engaged in slavery was brief (in the grand scheme of world history), a dangerous flirtation, a powerful seduction. Then we snapped back to our senses, to our values of right and wrong. The ancient Greeks had no such moral issues, as entire conquered armies were enslaved as a matter of policy. Another common occurrence in the Old World involved forced marriages between a Conquering and Conquered People, to ensure future peace.

As you can see, this whole slavery thing is kinda complicated and convoluted. And yet, we want someone to blame, someone to pay. If only people would fit nicely into Good and Bad categories based on skin color, then we could guilt their descendents into giving the rest of us money or advantage. But good and bad cannot be determined by skin color.

I am writing this today for two reasons:
1. To give Obama a how-to map for truly a “Post-Racial” America. Reparations and special treatment based on skin color are bulls***. Get rid of ‘em. Polls based on skin color are silly, too. Census questions, government studies, counts of military members, college students, drug abusers, criminals, focused on skin color, why? Why? Ridiculous. It ignores an individual’s free will. Maybe they’re in the Army, university, or jail because THEY CHOSE IT. The only official discrimination still happening is Affirmative Action. Abolish it. It’s reverse racism, pure and simple. Don’t endorse it any more. The remnants of racism in our society is a societal issue, not a political issue. No matter how many laws we make and throw at it, societal attitudes change slowly and mostly through positive personal experiences. Official reverse discrimination only retards the pace of change by undermining those positive personal experiences.
2. To give dumb racist organizations like the NAACP something meaningful to do. They need to shift all their resources to today’s world stage where REAL SLAVERY is still happening! At the height of the slave trade in the 1780s, 80,000 Africans were brought to the entire NEW WORLD annually. Today, between 600,000 and 800,000 people are trafficked across borders as bonded laborers or sex slaves annually, according to the US State Department. Most are women. I’ve even got a new name for the NAACP: something like the National Association for the Advancement of Humanity.

I could barely read the story of Mahabouba Muhammad, found in the new book “Half the Sky,” due to the tears standing in my eyes. This young Ethiopian girl was SOLD to a 60-year-old man as a 2nd wife. Then she tries to deliver her baby by herself in the bush, suffers “fistula” injuries (hole between birth canal and internal organs). She stinks of leaking waste, fellow villagers take her to the edge of town for the hyenas to eat. She drags herself to a hospital, where she is healed, learns to read and write, and helps similar patients. WHO estimates 2 million women with untreated fistulas worldwide, mostly in sub-Saharan Africa. A simple surgery can fix.

I want to ask every person in America, young and old: Now tell me again why you can’t or didn’t go to college? Or pursue whatever dream you have? Exactly what is holding you back? Ohhh, your great-great-great-great grandparents were brought here as slaves, probably from sub-Saharan Africa…I see.

Can’t We All Just Get Along?

Everybody needs to stop with the racism. I feel that we had made such strides in race relations…until Obama was elected. What a stoopid paradox, indeed.

I feel it’s apparent that Obama was elected only because he was “packaged” as a black man, and many of those who voted for him had no clue about his policies or agenda. Why is he touted as “America’s First Black President,” technically inaccurate. Why not “America’s First Half-Black Half-White President”? Why not be just an American, since we’re all mixtures of this and that. BECAUSE his promoters PLACED emphasis on race and plan to keep it there for another 2 ½ years, whipping the masses, the grex venalium, into a frenzy.

Sad. Have race relations digressed 20 years? It sure feels that way to me. A person who appears white cannot disagree with the president’s policy without being accused of racism. And that is very frustrating to those who feel this accusation is a way to undermine and discount their true position on the policy.

Then Obama brought his own reverse-racism to the office, which adds more fuel to the fire. It’s almost as if he and his strategists sit around and think up new ways of stirring the pot. His administration emphasizes whatever external “package” a person offers over substance, qualifications, in its appointments and seems to choose hot-button areas in which to push when the timing is just not good. He polarizes us instead of brings us closer together as a country.

If only he could offer us more…like the wisdom and life experience and dignity of a Nelson Mandela. I think Oprah would rock as a POTUS! Imagine the phenomenal cut in pay and power she’d have to take, though. But the sound bites! Her strengths are communication, connecting with common people and managing her public perception every day of the week!

Heavy taxation, government programs, and unenforced immigration laws over the course of many years and administrations have fed this situation of heightened race relations as well. An increased population clamoring for LIMITED resources can really bring out the ugly in people. Taxes are simply too high, and the people carrying that heavy tax burden are angry and trying to use whatever tools and means they can to understand, pinpoint cause, and protest. Those people with less power and means, hotter temperaments and less personal restraint will rely on more primitive solutions such as verbal attacks and violence. Those people on the other side with less means, hotter temperaments, and less restraint will respond in same. They drag everyone down with them – into Angry Mob Mentality.

Two episodes of the television program “Who Do You Think You Are” come to mind. Awesome show tracing family histories of celebrities. Emmitt Smith’s blood test revealed he is ONLY 81% African. The other percentages were Native American (7%) and European (white – 12%). I was flabbergasted because he “appears” to be such a dark-skinned man. But my shock was nothing compared to that of Spike Lee who found out one of his relatives was a white SLAVE-OWNER (gee, does that put him in the same category as me and other light-skinned people that one assumes descended from slave-owners?) Hmmm.

Point being: No one is alive TODAY who was a slave-owner in the U.S. pre-Civil War. Why are we still talking about it like it happened yesterday? Why are we still blaming and compensating for it like it happened yesterday? For Gawd’s sake, people, get OVER it. The only thing holding any of us back is ourselves.

I suspect if we all had a DNA diagnostic, we would find WE ALL HAVE the blood of slaves AND slave-owners in our veins. We are the melting pot, the salad bowl, the land of fascinating, stimulating, exciting diversity. Do NOT let the stoopid turn us into a pack of mongrel dogs.